when love turns into hatred

Oh my god. my parents make me so mad.


I love them to death, respect them, and appreciate everything they do for me but sometimes they can be so.. frustrating! over the past few days my mum has been moaning at me to start studying for my exams that are in may.. obviously i know that i need to study but I'm so stubborn and independent so when I'm going to do something I'll do it in my own time, on my own terms. i hate it when my parents constantly tell me what to do.
i have friends that have lost a parent or their parents are divorced, or their parents are really strict so i know that I'm lucky to have such great parents. they're not too strict or pushy and I'm definitely not spoilt but when i ask for something for Christmas or my birthday-as long as its nothing to crazy- i normally get it. but i just cant deal with it when they get on at me about things, i need my space.
when i get mad, i get really mad. i don't think me friends realize this but my parents certainly know it. i know that I'm being selfish when i yell at them and tell them that they don't care when they do. i honestly don't know what I'd do without them. my parents drive my to school, take me places, drive me to school, dancing etc, buy my things and pay for tutors. i honestly wish i wasn't so selfish but when it comes to school and studying, i wish they would just leave me be. i know that i need to get straight A's to get into the uni i want to go to and i don't need them to constantly tell me that.
i love all my family but i don't think they realize how much pressure I'm under. they expect me to get straight A's, my whole family does! but i want those A's just a much as they do. i want them so badly! i just wish my parents would tell me less about how much work i need to do and more about how they just want me to do my best.


if this if how i react to intermediate 2's then i have no idea how I'm going to cope with higher..


so now I'm sitting in my room listening to Taylor swift and I've calmed down a bit. so i think I'll go apologize for yelling and then i might go do a bit of one of the physics past papers that my mum got me today.
mum and dad, I'm sorry for being a brat, i love you.